Prayers: A Pathway to Empathy | 10/5/25
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Paul’s prayer for the Philippians overflowed with gratitude and joy. Who in your life might you thank God for in your own prayers this week?
How might prayer help expand your capacity for empathy, especially toward someone difficult to love or understand?
Which of the “Five (or Six) Finger Prayer” categories feels easiest for you to pray through? Which feels hardest?
Beth Moore’s quote challenges us to turn conversations about others into prayers for others. Where could that shift make a difference in your relationships?
How could cultivating a deeper prayer life strengthen both your personal faith and the life of your church community?
Transcript:
Two weeks ago, at each of our morning worship services, we had the privilege of welcoming new people into membership in the life of the church. Every time we do that, every time somebody joins the congregation, there is a liturgy that we use, and there are questions that new members respond to as a way of saying yes to connecting with this particular part of the body of Christ.
And every time we, as the gathered church, hear them respond to those questions, it’s an opportunity for us to be reminded of our own commitment to saying yes to those questions as well. One of the questions, in fact, the final question, that is responded to goes like this: “As a member of this congregation, will you faithfully participate in its ministries through your prayers, your presence, your gifts, your service, and your witness?”
Five commitments. Five ways of living out faith and living it out within a particular faith community. For the next five weeks, we are going to take a look at each of those practices. Because living out those practices and reminding ourselves of them is one of the ways in which we remind ourselves of who we are—who we are as children of God, who we are as followers of Christ, and who we are as members of the body of Christ.
We’re going to start today with “prayers,” because prayers are first in the list. And I want to be clear that I don’t think there’s a hierarchy here; one of the commitments is not better than the others. They all actually go together. It’s not an either-or selection or a cafeteria plan; it’s together the way in which we live our faith.
But it does catch my eye when I see “prayers” at the beginning of the list, and it’s a reminder for me of the importance of prayer as a vital aspect of our lives, and as a vital aspect of our participation in the life of the church. Prayer connects us with God, and prayer connects us with one another. It’s both-and. Prayer can take a lot of different forms.
Today, as we celebrate World Communion Sunday, we might imagine in our minds groups of people gathered in prayer around the world. Prayer is a way in which we connect.
Much has been written, preached, and taught about how prayer connects us to God and deepens our relationship with God, and that’s important. We do need to pay attention to how prayer nurtures the spiritual life and our relationship with God on the vertical plane. But today I want to emphasize the other side of the coin: the impact that prayer has on our relationships with each other, both the people we can see right in front of us and the people we don’t see, don’t know, or maybe think we know but really don’t.
To help us with that, we’re going to turn to a little book in the New Testament called Philippians. It was a letter written by the Apostle Paul to a community in the city of Philippi, to a group of believers, a church, that he had planted on one of his missionary journeys. As you hear these words, which are the introduction, or the salutation, of his letter to them, listen to the fondness in his writing:
“I thank my God every time I mention you in my prayers. I am thankful for all of you every time I pray, and it’s always a prayer full of joy. I’m glad because of the way you have been my partners in the ministry of the gospel from the time you first believed it until now. I’m sure about this: the one who started a good work in you will stay with you to complete the job by the day of Christ Jesus.
I have good reason to think this way about all of you because I keep you in my heart. You are all my partners in God’s grace, both during my time in prison and in the defense and support of the gospel. God is my witness that I feel affection for all of you with the compassion of Christ Jesus. This is my prayer: that your love might become even more and more rich with knowledge and all kinds of insight.
I pray this so that you will be able to decide what really matters, and so you will be sincere and blameless on the day of Christ. I pray that you will then be filled with the fruit of righteousness which comes from Jesus Christ, in order to give glory and praise to God.”
This is the Word of God for the people of God, and God’s people say, “Thanks be to God.”
Would you pray with me? Come, Holy Spirit, and breathe life into the words that I speak, that they might carry a word from you into our hearts and lives this morning. Amen.
“I thank my God every time I mention you in my prayers.” As we listen in on the beginning of this letter, we can hear this as an intimate snapshot of Paul’s relationship with this group of people that he has cared so deeply for, and that he, in fact, has brought together as a community of faith. We hear Paul expressing his deep love for them, and we realize that his affection is grounded in his prayer life—specifically, in his prayers for them.
Did you notice how many times the notion of prayer showed up in those few verses? Six times we hear the word “pray” or “prayer” mentioned in that opening section of the letter. And his prayers are for their well-being, that they might come to know the very best that God has in mind for them as a people of faith. What I notice as I listen to his prayer, particularly as it reaches the end of that section, is the clarity he has in praying. He specifically asks on their behalf for them to gain insight that helps them grow deeper in love, so that they can focus on what really matters, so that their lives will bear fruit. That’s a lot of clarity. Wouldn’t you love it if there was someone praying for you with that kind of clarity?
And on the flip side, what if you could be that kind of person praying on behalf of somebody else? Well, you can be. The more we pray and the more we take time to be in prayer, the deeper our prayer life will grow and the more connected we will feel both to God and to the people for whom we pray.
As we listen to the example of Paul’s prayer, one of the things we can quickly deduce is that prayer expands our capacity for empathy. At the beginning of this letter, it may sound like everything is wonderful in Philippi, that this is the perfect community of faith where people are happy all the time and joyful, and there are no problems anywhere to be found. Far from the reality, my friends. We know there is no perfect community. In fact, a little later in the letter, Paul addresses a situation going on. He urges two members of that community, Euodia and Syntyche, to reconcile with each other and pleads with the community to help them do that work.
Yet, even in the face of challenges that might have Paul sometimes shaking his head or wringing his hands, he keeps praying for them. And in praying for them, his love deepens for them to the point where he is able to say, “Every time I pray for you, I do so with thanksgiving and with joy.”
Paul likely learned about praying and about the need to deepen his prayer life from Jesus’ example, the one he was seeking to follow. As we look in the Gospels, we see Jesus praying for his disciples and urging them to be people of prayer as well. Today, on World Communion Sunday, we remember that beautiful prayer he offers in the Gospel of John on the night before he died, when he turns from the table toward God and pleads, “Please, Father, make them one with each other as you and I are one.”
Paul also surely knew that Jesus didn’t just pray for the people closest to him. He prayed for the people who hated him as well, even praying for those who were putting him to death on a cross: “Father, forgive them.” Prayer connects us with God, and prayer connects us with the people around us.
So maybe you’re wondering this morning, “Okay, I hear that. How do I do this? How do I pray in such a way that I might cultivate greater empathy for others in my life?” The first thing I want to say is this: prayer can look a lot of different ways. Prayer can sound a lot of different ways. There is no right language, no right formula or script that you must follow in order to be in conversation with God. Prayer, first and foremost, should be authentic—honest, real, and truthful.
Sometimes it helps to have some tools. This morning I want to offer you some tools. Not as prescriptions, but as ways that might spark your imagination or guide your own prayer life. I’m going to offer three.
The first one is something that for generations the church has called the Prayer of the Faithful. Many of you have likely participated in some version of it. It’s a method of prayer where there are short phrases or sentences that call to mind different groupings of people, at the end of which there is a response. Typically one person offers the phrase, and the entire gathered body joins in the response so that it becomes a collective prayer, the prayer of all those gathered.
One of the places where I experience this in a powerful way is whenever I go to the Green Bough House of Prayer. Some of you have heard me mention that place of silent retreat before. One of the few times when we break the silence on retreat is when we are gathered at 5:15 p.m. in the chapel for the Eucharist prayer service. Together we join in the Prayer of the Faithful before we come to the communion table with one another.
So I thought maybe we would experience the Prayer of the Faithful together this morning. I’m going to read some phrases, and at the end of each one I’ll say, “We ask,” and together you all will respond, “Receive our prayer, O God.”
So we begin with prayers for the church. Stir up your spirit within us that we may love without expectation.
Forgive without condition and hope without limits, we ask.
For a flowering of faith in the world that all people can believe in the development of a more humane and compassionate world where the hungry, poor, and alienated are satisfied and treated with dignity. We pray for patience. May we never abandon our hope, we ask.
For world leaders and governments. May they seek vision so that their work can bring joy, promise and peace to all people and especially for the weak, powerless, and hopeless, we ask this day.
For the grace to support each other's hopes and dreams, and the strength to build and affirm each other's faith through all of life's difficulties and transitions, we ask.
We ask and see how prayer can bring comfort to our beloved sick, addicted, dying and grieving. And hear the intentions we hold in silence, we ask.
As you listen to those phrases, if our ears and hearts are open to the movement of the Spirit, it’s hard to imagine praying that prayer without empathy expanding within us, to call to mind the people of the world and ask God to care for them. That’s the Prayer of the Faithful.
There’s another type of prayer similar in style that encourages us to think of groupings of people we might pray for. It’s called The Five-Finger Prayer. It uses your hand to help guide you through different parts of the prayer.
You start with the thumb, representing those closest to you: your family and friends. Then the pointer finger is for those who help point you in the right direction: teachers, leaders, counselors, spiritual guides. The middle finger, the tallest, reminds us to pray for those in leadership: leaders in our community, state, nation, and world. The ring finger, being the weakest, prompts us to pray for those who are suffering: the poor, oppressed, marginalized, and hurting. And lastly, the pinky, the smallest, reminds us to pray for ourselves. It’s important to pray for ourselves too, and after we’ve prayed to gain deeper empathy and love for others, it’s good to remember to have empathy for ourselves as well.
Now, this is a great model and an easy way to remember those groupings. But I find I need a sixth finger. Because it’s possible to go through all five and not pray for the people I really would rather not pray for. And if I’m going to grow in empathy, I need to pray for those people. Jesus tells me I need to: “Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you.” Billy Graham once said, “You cannot earnestly pray for someone and hate them at the same time.” The five—or six—finger prayer.
Lastly, I want to tell you about a gift I received a few years back: a prayer bowl. You can make your own by using any bowl you have and slips of paper or index cards. The one I was given came with cards that include prayer prompts like: “God, please bring peace to ___.” “Jesus, wrap your loving arms around ___.” “Heal my friend of ___.” “Watch over ___ on their journey.” “Thank you for ___.” “Let ___ feel your never-ending love.” “Give ___ courage.”
Those prayers not only connect you to God, but deepen your empathy and compassion for others. Some cards are blank, so you can add your own prayers, like: “Help me understand ___.” “Make my words with ___ both honest and gracious.” “Fill ___ with your Holy Spirit.” Let the Spirit do its work, both on them and on you, as you invest yourself in those prayers.
Beth Moore once said, “If we would turn the time we spent discussing others’ lives into prayer time instead, no telling what would happen to the glory of God.”
So, for these next few weeks, we’ll be looking at these different practices. Today we begin with prayers. Whether it’s prayers or any of the other practices, I want to call attention to three ways in which they make a difference. One: they enable us to bring glory to God. Two: they strengthen the church. The church is better able to be the church when we live into these vows of prayers, presence, gifts, service, and witness. And three: they help us follow Jesus better.
We know from the Gospels that Jesus modeled a robust prayer life. He would engage, then step away to pray, and then engage again. Every time he came back from prayer, we saw him deal with people with kindness, compassion, love, and courage. He cared deeply for those he interacted with. Following Jesus requires stretching our empathy muscles, and one of the best ways I know to do that is through a robust prayer life.
Perhaps C.S. Lewis said it best: “I pray because the need flows out of me all the time, waking and sleeping. It doesn’t change God. It changes me.”
Will you pray with me? Gracious God, as we lift our hearts together in prayer this morning, we give you thanks for the witness of your Son Jesus and for the gift of prayer that binds us not only to you but also deepens our empathy for all of your children. Amen.