Seeing Through the Pain | 8/17/25
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The disciples were shocked to see Jesus talking with the Samaritan woman.
When have you been surprised by the people God chooses to work through?
Jesus often went out of his way to meet people where they were.
What “third spaces” in your community might God be calling you to show up in?
Think about the woman leaving her jar behind.
What “jars” might you need to set down in order to step into the living water of Christ?
The woman at the well became the first evangelist in John’s gospel.
What does her story say to us about the role of women in sharing the good news today?
Jesus really saw the Samaritan woman.
Who in your life might need to be truly seen and valued this week?
Transcript:
This morning, we begin a new series of messages. Over these next three weeks, we’re going to take a look at some encounters that we see Jesus having in the Gospels. As we look at these stories, my hope is that we will learn some things from Jesus, that we will take new cues from him about how we might better see the people around us.
We’re going to start with a story this morning from the Gospel of John that likely will be familiar to you. But before we read that together, I want to offer just a couple of contextual comments as backdrop—one historical and one very current.
The historical comment is this: in this story, we are listening to a conversation between a Jewish man and a Samaritan woman. To give a little history, there was a time when all of that region was part of the Kingdom of Israel. Then, in the Hebrew scriptures in the Old Testament, we read about a time when the kingdom was divided. With that division came fracture—two separate kingdoms, two separate rules. Both were eventually captured, many people taken into captivity. From then until the time of Jesus, tension and animosity grew, such that people from Judea would not want to associate with people from Samaria, and vice versa. In fact, they would do everything possible to avoid one another. You’ll hear a line in the Scripture today that says exactly that.
The more current and immediate context is this: in a time when, shockingly to me, there are voices rising up that seem to question the personhood and the agency of women—particularly on the Sunday after an interview aired where a pastor who leads a church was quoted as suggesting that women should no longer have the right to vote—yes, this happened this past week, friends—it is a good Sunday for us to hear a story about Jesus seeing a woman. It is good for us to be reminded that throughout the Gospels we hear examples of Jesus seeing, inviting, and celebrating the gifts of women.
And so today, not because I picked it out this week but because we picked it out a while ago, we are going to look at the story of Jesus and the woman at the well. I invite you to follow along as I read these verses. I’ll tell you ahead of time: it’s a lengthy Scripture because it’s a conversation, so we’re going to listen in as Jesus and the woman speak together.
He came to a Samaritan city called Sychar, near the land Jacob had given to his son Joseph. Jacob’s well was there. [So we’re not talking about just any well—we’re talking about the well that Jacob himself, grandson of Abraham, son of Isaac, had dug.] Jesus, tired from his journey, sat down at the well. It was about noon.
A Samaritan woman came to draw water, and Jesus said to her, “Give me some water to drink.” His disciples had gone into the city to buy food.
The Samaritan woman asked, “Why do you, a Jewish man, ask for something to drink from me, a Samaritan woman?” (Jews and Samaritans didn’t associate with each other.)
Jesus responded, “If you recognized God’s gift, and who is saying to you, ‘Give me some water to drink,’ you would be asking him, and he would give you living water.”
The woman said to him, “Sir, you don’t have a bucket, and the well is deep. Where would you get this living water? You aren’t greater than our father Jacob, are you? He gave this well to us, and he drank from it himself, as did his sons and his livestock.”
Jesus answered, “Everyone who drinks this water will be thirsty again, but whoever drinks the water I give will never be thirsty again. The water I give will become in them a spring that bubbles up into eternal life.”
The woman said, “Sir, give me this water so I will never be thirsty and never need to come here to draw again.”
Jesus said, “Go, get your husband, and come back here.”
The woman replied, “I don’t have a husband.”
“You are right to say, ‘I don’t have a husband,’” Jesus answered. “You’ve had five husbands, and the man you are with now isn’t your husband. You have spoken the truth.”
The woman said, “Sir, I see you are a prophet. Our ancestors worshiped on this mountain, but you and your people say it is necessary to worship in Jerusalem.”
Jesus said, “Believe me, woman, the time is coming when you and your people will worship the Father neither on this mountain nor in Jerusalem. You worship what you don’t know; we worship what we know, because salvation is from the Jews. But the time is coming—and is here now—when true worshipers will worship in spirit and truth. The Father looks for those who worship him this way. God is spirit, and it is necessary to worship God in spirit and truth.”
The woman said, “I know that the Messiah is coming, the one who is called the Christ. When he comes, he will teach everything to us.”
And Jesus said to her, “I am the one who speaks with you.”
Just then, Jesus’ disciples arrived and were shocked that he was talking with a woman. But no one asked, “What do you want?” or “Why are you talking with her?” The woman put down her water jar and went into the city. She said to the people, “Come and see a man who has told me everything I have done! Could this man be the Christ?” (John 4:5-29)
This is the Word of God for the people of God. And God’s people say, “Thanks be to God.”
Would you pray with me?
Come, Holy Spirit, and breathe life into the words that I speak, that they might carry a word from you into our hearts and lives this morning. Amen.
This story is one of those that is so familiar that we may not, if we’re not careful, recognize how astounding this encounter really is. Jesus defies all sorts of assumptions and expectations of his day in having this conversation. The person he meets at Jacob’s well is the wrong gender, from the wrong place, with the wrong background, and who believes the wrong things.
Any one of those things would have been enough to cancel this conversation, but Jesus engages. And I wonder what we can learn from him today about seeing people.
The first thing we might notice is that Jesus goes. This is a pattern we see throughout his ministry in all of the Gospels. Jesus doesn’t stay put; he goes to where the people are. He does not expect or wait for people to come to him. Rather, he shows up in all sorts of places. Because he does this, it makes it possible for him to interact with people he otherwise wouldn’t. Just think—if he had not gone to the well in Samaria, this encounter never would have happened.
Now, did Jesus know beforehand that on this day he would meet this woman at this well and have this conversation? I don’t know. What I do know is that because he goes, because he chooses to travel through Samaria, because he chooses to sit at the well, he puts himself in a position to have an encounter with someone he otherwise would not.
Jesus is, for us, a wonderful first-century example of someone who shows up in a “third space.” That’s a term often used today to describe spaces that aren’t our homes, workplaces, or churches, but another place where we can get to know someone else, where we can experience connection and community with others.
There was a time, even here in this community and across America, when you could assume most people would show up at church somewhere on Sunday morning. Churches built facilities, grew campuses, expanded ministries, and then waited for people to come—and people did. But we are in a very different time today.
These times call us to see what Jesus does and do likewise: to go into third spaces where we might have the opportunity to meet someone who may never come to us—unless they first experience God’s grace and presence out there somewhere.
So we need to show up and pay attention in the third spaces of our community—diners and coffee shops, gyms and bars, barber shops and grocery stores, parks and playgrounds. And when we show up, we need to pay attention.
Jesus shows up at the well, and once he’s there, Jesus sees. The Scripture tells us he was tired, and yet he kept his eyes open. It also tells us it was about noon—the heat of the day. That detail not only tells us about the temperature but also about this being an unusual time to draw water.
I remember some years ago being in Angola. Early one morning, while waiting for the bishop and others to pick us up for visits, I noticed women coming out of their homes, walking dirt paths with five-gallon jugs on their heads. They were making a journey of several miles to collect water, fill their jugs, and return. Day after day, they did this.
I suspect the same would have been true in Samaria. Women went early, together—for safety and for company. But in this story, it is about noon, and Jesus sees a woman coming alone.
Jesus could already see that life had been hard for her. Later in the story, we learn she has had five husbands and is living with another man. Over her life, she has been dismissed, disappointed, shunned, and shamed.
But before we judge too harshly, let’s remember her environment: a world where her livelihood depended on being connected to a man who could provide her basic needs, where life expectancy was much shorter, where men could divorce wives for almost anything, and where a brother was expected to take in his brother’s widow. Suddenly her story looks different, doesn’t it?
Her life has hardened her. She’s gotten good at shielding her heart and keeping others at arm’s length. We hear it in her responses to Jesus.
When we show up in third spaces, who and what do we see? Do we judge? Or can we be curious instead? Can we imagine what Jesus would notice?
At the well, Jesus initiates the conversation by putting himself in the position of being the one in need. “Could you give me a drink?” He does not approach from a position of power but from humility.
The woman is understandably suspicious—Jewish man, Samaritan woman. Perhaps we can forgive her for being less than gracious. And if we can forgive her, perhaps we can also forgive others in our lives who are less than gracious with us—because we never know what they’re carrying. People need compassion.
Jesus invests in this woman. He takes time. He doesn’t flinch or turn away, though she tries to build walls. Over seventeen verses, he stays engaged.
If we want better outcomes in our world, if we want healthier relationships, if we want more hopeful dialogue, we need to move toward people rather than away from them.
Here in John, we find one of the longest one-on-one conversations in the Gospels. Jesus listens carefully and responds with grace. Ultimately, he invites her to living water, to transparency and freedom from shame, to inclusion through honest worship, and to recognize him as Messiah.
Right at that moment, the disciples return. What timing! And they are shocked. Eugene Peterson paraphrases it: “No one said what they were all thinking, but their faces sure showed it.”
They were deeply disturbed: Jesus, what are you doing talking to a Samaritan woman? They didn’t say it, but they were thinking it.
And then comes this line from a commentator: “Jesus’ vision for the church is always one step ahead of his disciples.”
The woman takes their arrival as her cue. She leaves her jug and heads back to town. That jug left behind symbolizes her decision to take up living water. She walks back—almost dancing, hands raised in the light of revelation.
Back in town, people must have noticed something different about her, because they listened. This woman, who had been alone, outcast, shunned—suddenly, people listened to her story. Later in John 4, we read that many Samaritans believed because of her word.
The Samaritan woman is the first evangelist in John’s Gospel to carry the good news of Jesus to others. The first. So the next time you hear someone suggest women are not able or equipped to preach, teach, or lead, please ask them: Have you heard the one about the Samaritan woman?
Many Samaritans believed because of the woman’s word, all because Jesus saw her. He really saw her. You never know how you might impact a life when you really see someone.
Will you pray with me?
Open our eyes, Lord, to see as you see.
Open our hearts, Lord, to love as you love.
And help us to trust you enough to follow,
Because you are always one step ahead of us.
Amen.